Hey, gotta keep trying. Gotta keep holding on to whatchagot (which sure ain't a lot)

Why does it seem like when you want things to stay the same, they up and change on you, but when a little change might be nice, you start living life like it's Groundhog Day?

Life has been in a sort of doldrums. To the point where even working up the energy to think about anything (like working on one of the 2493762 UFOs I have) more work than it's worth. In the last two weeks, I have finished a sock. That's it, just one sock. The same Uzume sock I'd been working on for over a month. While I should herald that as progress, I can't seem to get myself started on the other one and, really, what the hell good is just on sock?

Consequently, I've been avoiding ravelry for a week or two as well, and skimming through all of the fabulous knitting blogs I read. I'm terribly happy for all the folks who went to Rhinebeck and enjoyed the hell out of themselves, but reading too much about it might just make me stab myself in the eye.

(See how morose I've become? It's just pitiful.)

But when I woke up this morning on my day off, the rain and clouds had blown away to reveal a beautiful, rather balmy fall day. It seems like a sign that today is the day to kick myself out of my funk.

I started by just thinking about good things, like the spinning wheel I'm saving up for, and whether I should take some of that spinning wheel money and put it towards a spinning class. It would set me back a month or two from buying one, but then again I'd have a better idea of how to use it then. As far as problems go, it's a pretty good one to have.

Now, it's time to shower and get some stuff done.

The to do list for today:
-felt a sweater Gus got ahold of last night*
-Work out some Halloween costume details
-make trips to the following places:

• craft store
• hardware store
• Goodwill
• possibly Old Navy

-find some star earrings, or make them myself
-make soup
-dye my hair
-return the batteries I bought and get the right ones
-take mucho pictures of all WIPs, FOs, and whatever the heck else

*And of course, it just had to be my favorite cardigan that he chewed holes through. My oh-so-wonderful purple 100% cashmere cardigan that I found at Goodwill for $8.00. I atleast have to give it to him-- Gus has got good taste.

Motivation, such an aggravation....

Right now I should be making pizza dough, doing dishes, finding places for the dozen-or-so bags of chips that were left over from last night's superbowl shindig, and generally getting things put in order before my friends show up in a couple of hours.

So what am I doing instead? Sitting here reading things on the internet. I'm not sure if it's my completely dysfunctional need to leave things until the last minute, or that I have a had ZERO motivation today. I think it might be a combination of both.

I think it's also some other stuff that I'm just not ready to deal with yet. Right on the heels of one big scary decision, another one came along, and I haven't had enough time to properly mull things over. This seems to be the year for making some pretty big changes I think.

Okay, I've squandered enough time. That pizza dough isn't going to make itself.

Warning: If it hasn't been made obvious yet, I write the way I speak. And I speak in parentheticals.

Do you have those friends that you can spend hours with, without ever getting bored or needing some other distraction (ie, a movie or a game or some other form of entertainment)? I do, and I am so grateful for it. I also consider myself lucky in that two of those friends are miraculously dating eachother (which means I get two for the price of one!) and another one of those is my boyfriend.

The four of us (myself, E, and our friends Jen and Mike) spent the night hanging out, having drinks, and basically shooting the shit, and it was quite honestly one of the best nights I've had all week. Sometimes I feel bad and/or neglectful of our other friends, since we hang out with these two so much. At the same time, I don't.

I even got to briefly teach Jen about spinning! I've been (very) slowly teaching her how to knit, but I'm beginning to think spinning might be more her thing.

In other news, I've come to a decision about the things I was mulling over yesterday. Basically, I was offered a really big, but kind of scary, job opportunity. I mix paint for a living, for one of those big-box hardware stores. I have been offered the option to go to a smaller, more local store a couple of times. This time, I was made a really good offer. The manager of this smaller store wants me to come work there and eventually take over his job when he moves on, which is going to happen within the next six months. On one hand, this is an amazing opportunity, and would eventually mean making almost twice as much money as I do now while doing something that I enjoy and am good at. On the other, I'm terrified that I will be biting off more than I can chew. Managing my own store would be the biggest responsibility that I've ever had in my life, and I'm scared shitless that I will fall flat on my face. But after a lot of thought I finally had to ask myself, "what is life without taking risks?"

So I think I'm going to fight my fears and go for it.

To sum up, I am feeling very good about today.